Toilet training or “potty training” is a big and necessary milestone in your toddler’s development. Most children are able to control their bladder and bowels by 18 to 24 months, the time when they would have achieved sufficient physical and cognitive skills to understand instructions or communication and are able to sit, walk and run unaided.
Although 18 to 24 months is the average age, some children may take a little longer as each child develops at his or her own pace. The important thing is to watch out for is their readiness. There are three basic signs to see if your toddler is ready to be toilet trained.
A: Bladder Control
Is your child able to stay dry for at least two hours or more?
Does the child know about the need to pass urine (using facial expressions, also watch his legs to see if he is scrunching them to hold the urgent need to pee)
Is he able to void all of his urine at one time or does he still drip?
If you’ve answered yes to all three or at least two out of three, then you are able to start toilet training.
B: Willingness to Cooperate
Can your child understand directions and cooperate? Give him simple instructions to see, such as lie down, stand up or put the toy in the box. If your toddler can do this willingly, then he is prepared to be toilet trained.
C: Physical Readiness
Can your toddler pick up small objects with ease?
Can your child walk or move around by himself?
Can your child squat or sit on a bench or seat and balance himself?
Can your child pull clothes up or down?
Does your child come to you for a change when he feels uncomfortable after soiling his diapers?
Does he ask for privacy or wants to be alone when he needs to move his bowels?
If you’ve answered yes to the above, then your child is able to control his body movements and is aware of his bodily functions.
Are Both of You Ready for Toilet Training?
Toilet-training is not just about your child’s readiness but yours as well. Your confidence in yourself and planning ahead of time is crucial to the success of the whole operation.
Remember that toilet training is not an overnight process. It can take weeks or months for the process to be completed.
Also, keep in mind that accidents are inevitable and punishment has no role in the process. Plan toilet training for when you can devote the time and energy to be consistent on a daily basis for a few months.
Remember ─ The key to success is repetition and consistency.
Some Preparations Beforehand
First, prepare. Observe his timings. How soon after a meal will he usually eliminate? Make a note of that, say, a week or two beforehand.
Buy a potty. Better still, take him along to the store and ask him to pick the potty that he likes and explain what it is for. Using a potty is going to be a new thing for him. To allay his fears, tell him that everyone uses the toilet to eliminate but he will start on a small one such as the potty. Buy him the potty that he will be able to straddle easily and won’t topple or tip. You can also buy him a toilet seat for placing on the adult commode but don’t expect him to use the toilet seat by himself until after he “graduates” from his little plastic potty.
Buy him easy to pull down underwear and pants-type diapers for night time training.
Now that you’ve got all your preliminaries, are you ready?
Here’s the 1,2,3 to Toilet Training
1: Bring Out the Potty You Bought
Take out that brand new potty you bought and make it visible by placing it not too far away from the child. In the beginning, don’t put it in the bathroom as it may be too far away for him to make it on time, or worse; since our Malaysian bathrooms tend to be wet and slippery, he might fall, or you might fall while trying to help him.
2: Show Him How to Remove His Underwear
Before this moment, your child was always eliminating in his pants. Now the moment has come when he will have to understand that he needs to remove his underwear first before sitting on the potty. Buy him clothes that are easy to pull down such as elasticized pants and underwear. Show him how he needs to pull down this clothing before he sits on the potty.
3: Schedule Potty Breaks
Remember his timing that you observed earlier? Was it half an hour after meals? Was it 15 minutes? Follow that timing. If it is 15 minutes or immediately after a meal, take him to the potty and say Shee Shee. If he is doing the big job, say Mmm Mmmm and encourage him all the way.
Praise him when he does the required job. Clap your hands or kiss him and say: What a good boy/girl he/she is!
Praise him also when he is able to tell you that he wants to eliminate, and respond quickly. Watch for signs such as squirming, squatting or holding the genital area. Sometimes he may not tell you.
Ask him often, say, like every one or two hours, if he would like to go to the toilet. Some parents prefer timing toilet breaks every 15 minutes. He may shake his head as he may be too engrossed in playing. Take him to the potty anyway.
Even if your child simply sits there, offer praise for trying, and remind your child that he or she can try again later. Don’t make him sit longer than 5 minutes at the potty. It’s not punishment. Allow him to get up if he or she wants to. The point is to associate the potty with elimination time.
Other times for the potty are: First thing in the morning and right after naps.
4: Mastering Urination for Boys
Keep in mind that for boys, it is often best to master urination sitting down at the potty. Only move to standing up after training to pass stool is complete.
5: Try Elimination Communication
Some parents use a method that is known in big terms such as “elimination communication” but in simple terms, it just means whistling.
Yes, whistling. Elimination communication is like a sound association with an action and whistling seems to work best for inducing urination.
There is a science-backed research[1] on how the Vietnamese use this method to teach their babies to urinate on command. They start their toilet training process very early on and are able to get their child fully toilet trained by 9 months. How they do it is simple. Every time their child pees, the mother would whistle. After a while, the child will associate the sound of whistling to the command to pee. When the time comes, they put their kid on a potty, whistle, and the kid will do the rest.
If you can’t whistle, it’s alright. Just say Shee-Shee or make a hissing sound such as Sssssss or Sshhhhh to symbolise urinating. Soon your child will associate the sound with the act of elimination. For moving the bowels, say Mmmm Mmmm or use any other word that best symbolises the act.
6: Washing
In Malaysia, we wash rather than wipe. However, it may be difficult for the toddler to attempt this, so in the beginning stages, you will need to help him or her wash, dry and teach them hygiene like washing their hands with soap and water.
This is where your toilet seat might come in handy. You can wash him or her while they sit on the toilet seat. You will need to help him get up on to the toilet seat or wash where it’s most convenient. Later on, you can teach your child to use the hand bidet by himself.
If you’re using toilet paper to wipe instead of washing, teach girls to always wipe carefully from front to back especially after a bowel movement. This prevents bringing germs from the rectum to the vagina or bladder.
7. Night-time Training
Nap and nighttime training may take a little longer to achieve. But if you want to achieve it fast, cut off all liquids and snacks after dinner. Complete one final potty mission before bed.
Remember to put his potty next to his bed so that he can reach it fast.
Some parents achieve success by waking the child in the middle of the night to urinate. However, this method may be tiring for both the child and the parent.
If waking in the night isn’t for you or the child, you can let him wear toilet-training pants-type diapers. Maintain cutting off the liquids and snacks after dinner to eliminate night time urination.
After a while, like say a week or two, his diaper will be dry throughout the night. Or you may wake up to find that he had woken up early in the morning and eliminated in his potty by himself.
Nutrition and Toilet Training
Although it may not seem related, nutrition plays a crucial role in successful toilet training, primarily by ensuring regular and healthy bowel movements and preventing constipation[2], which can make the process more challenging. Adequate fibre and fluid intake such as drinking enough water and eating lots of fruits and vegetables, whole grains and legumes can add bulk to stools and promote regular bowel movements. When children have regular bowel movements, they are more likely to recognize the need to use the toilet and can develop a routine for bowel movements. This predictability can make the toilet-training process smoother and less stressful.
Morinaga Chil-kid
Morinaga Chil-kid is a nutrient-dense, growing-up formula milk that has been made specially for Asian children aged 1 to 7.
The milk is a carefully balanced formula featuring 45 essential nutrients such as ARA+DHA, Inositol, Galacto-oligosaccharides (GOS)[3], 5 Nucleotides, Omega 3&6 Long Chain Polyunsaturated fatty acids, Protein and 21 key vitamins and minerals.
The GOS in the formula is a prebiotic that nourishes beneficial bacteria in the gut, which can improve digestive health and aid digestion.
Studies[4] have shown that GOS can help with moving the bowels especially in cases of constipation. It makes stools softer, thus making them easier to pass and can improve the regularity of bowel movements.
Formulated in Japan, the new and improved Morinaga Chil-kid is completely free from sucrose and features a subtle vanilla taste. With just two servings a day complemented with meals, the milk can satisfy a fast-growing child’s daily Recommended Nutrient Intake (RNI).
Morinaga Chil-kid’s formulation is backed by more than 100 years of Morinaga R&D in Japan, and the latest scientific research. Wholly produced and packed in the Netherlands, the milk goes through a double inspection process in the Netherlands and in Japan before it is exported to Malaysia.
[1]Whistle away the need for diapers: Vietnamese babies often out of diapers at nine months. (2013, January 13). ScienceDaily. https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2013/01/130130082726.htm
[2]Constipation in Children: How to Spot it and How to Deal with it | Tips and Guides | Morinaga Malaysia. (n.d.). Morinaga Malaysia. https://morinagamilk.com.my/detail-tip-guide.php?article=T2407310539253285
[3]Product - Morinaga Milk Formula | Morinaga Malaysia. (n.d.). Morinaga Malaysia. https://morinagamilk.com.my/product.php
[4]Lee, J., Kim, G., Han, K., Jung, E., Suh, H. J., & Jo, K. (2024). Efficacy and safety of galacto-oligosaccharide in the treatment of functional constipation: randomized clinical trial. Food & Function, 15(12), 6374–6382. https://doi.org/10.1039/d4fo00999a